The “One Another” Passages Are Commands, Not Options
Online church and spectator church don’t prioritize the practice of the “one another” commands. They make the “one another” passages optional add-ons, but Scripture doesn’t. A handshake and even a weekly hug is not the same as taking these commands seriously. But what if the practice of these commands is vital for the maturity of Christians? What if these commands are in Scripture to be practiced and prioritized?
The phrase “one another” is derived from the Greek word allelon, which means “one another, each other; mutually, reciprocally.” It occurs 100 times in the New Testament. Approximately 59 of those occurrences are specific commands teaching us how (and how not) to relate to one another. Obedience to those commands is imperative. It forms the basis for all true Christian community, and has a direct impact on our witness to the world (John 13:35). The following list is not exhaustive:
Positive Commands (how to treat one another)
- Love one another (John 13:34 – This command occurs at least 16 times)
- Be devoted to one another (Romans 12:10)
- Welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you (Romans 15:7)
- Honor one another above yourselves (Romans 12:10)
- Live in harmony with one another (Romans 12:16)
- Build up one another (Romans 14:19; 1 Thessalonians 5:11)
- Be like-minded towards one another (Romans 15:5)
- Accept one another (Romans 15:7)
- Admonish one another (Romans 15:14; Colossians 3:16)
- Greet one another (Romans 16:16)
- Care for one another (1 Corinthians 12:25)
- Serve one another (Galatians 5:13)
- Bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2)
- Forgive one another (Ephesians 4:2, 32; Colossians 3:13)
- Be patient with one another (Ephesians 4:2; Colossians 3:13)
- Speak the truth in love (Ephesians 4:15, 25)
- Be kind and compassionate to one another (Ephesians 4:32)
- Speak to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs (Ephesians 5:19)
- Submit to one another (Ephesians 5:21, 1 Peter 5:5)
- Consider others better than yourselves (Philippians 2:3)
- Look to the interests of one another (Philippians 2:4)
- Bear with one another (Colossians 3:13)
- Teach one another (Colossians 3:16)
- Comfort one another (1 Thessalonians 4:18)
- Encourage one another (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
- Exhort one another (Hebrews 3:13)
- Stir up [provoke, stimulate] one another to love and good works (Hebrews 10:24)
- Show hospitality to one another (1 Peter 4:9)
- Employ the gifts that God has given us for the benefit of one another (1 Peter 4:10)
- Clothe yourselves with humility towards one another (1 Peter 5:5)
- Pray for one another (James 5:16)
- Confess your faults to one another (James 5:16)
Negative Commands (how not to treat one another)
- Do not lie to one another (Colossians 3:9)
- Stop passing judgment on one another (Romans 14:13)
- If you keep on biting and devouring each other… you’ll be destroyed by each other (Galatians 5:15)
- Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other (Galatians 5:26)
- Do not slander one another (James 4:11)
- Don’t grumble against each other (James 5:9)
All of these passages assume a deep relational connection. As Christians, we are in a real sense “members of one another” (Romans 12:5; Ephesians 4:25) and very much need one another.
These “one another” commands cannot be practiced one Sunday a week, sitting in a church service. To truly practice the exhortations in these passages requires a type of “living together.” I think the whole Western American church structure needs a redo. I think the paradigm is sick. Perhaps church was never supposed to be structured with a stage and an audience to entertain? Perhaps the church was never meant to be something we merely attend? Perhaps “we are family” was never meant to be a church tagline, but a reality?
Perhaps it’s utterly vital that we prioritize practicing the one another passages? What if we need to restructure the church to ensure the practice of these passages? What if we need to make time, maybe even have a meal together at least once a week, to help ensure we’re complying with the commands of God’s word? Big adjustments would make sense if the “one another” passages are commands, not options.
I propose we make the changes and make it incredibly difficult for people to be passive observers of church. Jesus has said we are the church, His body. We need to be allegiant to Him as the Lord and do the things He has called us to do. I don’t want to make it easy for people to disobey the Lord.[1]
Notes
[1] I appreciate that a lot of churches have Sunday School or Community Groups but sadly a lot of people opt out of these. And sometimes churches make it to easy to opt out.
*Photo by Tegan Mierle
Jesus is the foundation, not “free love” or “forced law”
Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and not do what I tell you? Everyone who comes to me and hears my words and does them, I will show you what he is like: he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when a flood arose, the stream broke against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built. But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. When the stream broke against it, immediately it fell, and the ruin of that house was great (Luke 6:46-49).
To oversimplify, it seems to me that Christians who lean towards the conservative right could be liable to overly rejoice when moral ground is gained. On the other hand, more liberal-leaning Christians may be tempted to be overly distraught with certain people’s elections.
The reality is, however, that Jesus is the foundation—He is the solid ground. Everything else is sinking sand. Everything.
As Christians, may we not sing moralities praise or prosperities praise! No. Just Jesus’! Sure, prosperity is a blessing and a stewardship and I definitely believe it’s better to have a moral nation rather than an immoral one. But still, let’s keep our focus where our focus should lie: Christ and His Kingdom.
To oversimplify (again!), if one society leans towards “free love” and license (licentiousness), and one towards “forced law” and legalism, the ramifications will obviously be different but neither will be wholly good. The only truly good society is one built on Jesus. Now, of course, the full realization of that Kingdom is in the future (already/not yet).[1]
But we should faithfully work within our current “kingdoms,” and work for their prospering (Jeremiah 29:7). We shouldn’t be overly pessimistic or optimistic. We should think with sober and realistic judgment. And we should ever look to Jesus and His word and radically love and trust Him so we’re not hoodwinked (Revelation 2:4).

Sometimes the “free love” side rejoices when people have the freedom to make whatever choices they want, whatsoever those choices are. The “free love” side seems to see this “freedom” to align with love. On the other hand, Christians who lean towards the “forced law” side, see the enforcement of morality as good because law is good.
But Jesus talked about the law of Christ. He talked about the law of liberty. Jesus talked about something different from either one of those paradigms. We see this “law of love” in a few different places in Scripture.
- Starting in Deuteronomy 6:5 and 18, God says, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might… you shall do what is right and good in the sight of the Lord.”
- In Matthew 22:37–40, Jesus states that the two greatest commandments are to love God and love your neighbor as yourself.
- In John 13:34 Jesus says, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you.”
- Romans 13:8 and 10 says, “Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law… Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.
- Galatians 5:14 says about the same thing: “The whole law is fulfilled in one word: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'”
- James 2:8–9 shows us that the royal law of love is to love your neighbor as you love yourself.
Jesus isn’t building a “free love” or a “forced law” structure. Jesus explodes both of those paradigms as wrong and shortsighted. As Christians, we are to be about the Jesus structure, Jesus’ Kingdom. A whole different way of being human.
Jesus wasn’t with the Pharisees rejoicing at morality. Though, He did say you should do as they do—i.e., be moral (Matthew 23:3).[2] But Jesus wasn’t just super stoked at morality for morality’s sake. He didn’t act like morality itself was the cure to all that ails society (I know this sounds strange but hear me out).
But Jesus did talk about law. He fulfilled it! He also talked about and showed love. What Jesus got at, and the level we need to most care about, is the heart!
Jesus is the tightrope. We stand on Him or else! It’s perilous on either side. The solution is not merely “love” or “law.” It’s something altogether different. It’s the law of love.
Jesus is the way, the truth, the life. Until individuals in society have their houses firmly built on Him “love” and “law” are both sand and the house is destined to fall.
Let’s rejoice at what God rejoices at. We’re told God rejoices when a sinner comes to Him for salvation. God throws a party when that happens! God doesn’t throw a party when someone allows someone else to “follow their own heart,” whatever it is their heart says. God also doesn’t throw a party when someone is more morally upstanding than someone else. Actually, God says, “Woe to you hypocrites!” God rejoices, rather, when those who are utterly needy see their need and turn to Him. He rejoices when people build their everything on Jesus.
Are moral laws good for society? Is love good for society? Yes and yes! With Jesus they are. When Jesus defines law and love, yes. But where Jesus is not King, Satan reigns.[3] There have been nations that have been considered quite moral. Many Muslim countries are “moral” and Nazi Germany was even moral in many ways. But “moral” is not the Christian’s ultimate desire.
We pray “Thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” Heaven is not just moral, however. Heaven is a world of love. But it’s not “love” in the sense of the culture of the French Revolution.
We’d be wise to remember these words from that old hymn, “How Firm A Foundation”:
How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord,
Is laid for your faith in His excellent word!
What more can He say than to you He hath said,
To you who for refuge to Jesus have fled?Fear not, I am with thee, O be not dismayed,
For I am thy God, and will still give thee aid;
I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand,
Upheld by My righteous, omnipotent hand.When through the deep waters I call thee to go,
The rivers of sorrow shall not overflow;
For I will be with thee, thy troubles to bless,
And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,
My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply;
The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design
Thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine.E’en down to old age all My people shall prove
My sovereign, eternal, unchangeable love;
And then, when grey hairs shall their temples adorn,
Like lambs they shall still in My bosom be borne.The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose,
I will not, I will not desert to his foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,
I’ll never, no, never, no, never forsake!
Whether the dictatorship of oppressive law or the rage and licentiousness of the masses, the Christian’s hope is this: we have a firm foundation on the Lord. If to Jesus we have fled, no tempest can touch us. No breach can be made. We are loyal to the Lord of angelic armies, the King of kings, and the Lord of lords. The path to victory may lay in the grave, we’re not promised the road will be easy, but as sure as we’re planted we will rise.
The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose,
I will not, I will not desert to his foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,
I’ll never, no, never, no, never forsake!
So, let come what may! This world’s awash in sand but we’re built on the Stone! Let’s rejoice not in so-called “law” or “love,” but in Christ! And let’s ourselves live the law of love. A more moral culture is great but may we never forget we need Jesus!
As Christians, let’s build our house on Jesus the Rock and not just hear His word but do what He says (Luke 6:47). Let’s articulate and live a positive vision of life that calls us forward.[4] Let’s actually be what Jesus has called us to be. Let’s be salt in a world of decay, loving light in a world of darkness.
Notes
[1] The “already/not yet” theological concept refers to the idea that Christians already possess spiritual blessings, but they are not yet fully experiencing the complete consumption of those blessings.
[2] Jesus says, “Do and observe whatever they tell you, but not the works they do. For they preach, but do not practice.”
[3] Obviously, Jesus is King of kings and Lord of lords, and there is no being in the universe who will not bow before Him. But Satan is the god of this world and we can’t serve two masters (2 Cor. 4:4; Matt. 6:24). So, it would seem, that people are either ultimately following Jesus or following Satan.
[4] “As Christian theologians, we are not followers of John the Baptist, the prophet of national repentance, but of Jesus Christ, the bringer of good news to the whole world. The core of our response toward moral decline—where and when it exists—should be to articulate a positive vision of life that calls us forward” (Miroslav Golf and Matthew Croasmun, For the Life of the World: Theology That Makes a Difference).
Photo by Julian Gentile

